My Life as a Writer Part 1 by Robert Fullarton Copyright Robert Fullarton 2016

My Life as a Writer Part 1

by Robert Fullarton

Copyright Robert Fullarton 2016

The whole of my writing has been about the quest “to find God” or the “cry to God” in all situations. My early stories were concerned with the modern dystopia, the dysfunctional life of the western civilization when it tries to live apart from God, censors his name and word from print, circulation and public life at large. My writing has been about examining the extreme desperation of the loner, the pariah and the stranger in the midst of the crowd and to look upon the psychology of suffering. You begin to question the system of society for which we were born into and have become a part of, we know to readily that there is something malign, a corruption which is ancient and ongoing throughout the world, and such is within mankind.

I look back upon these early writings and find myself incredulous at the ideas or sheer darkness that surrounds the depths of the narrative on occasion. I was trying to convey the sickness of man, that has to be realised in a person who steps out of the single minded vision of the west, for those who realise every person individually needs personal and spiritual salvation. I had the tendency to over praise existentialism (which I did in ignorance in a sense of naive idealism) but in reality this was just a pointer or a phase of thought for which I would abandon and venture forward towards the Christian faith.
Our life, when we have individually surrendered our life it to Christ, is an elongation of his attributes, character traits, sufferings, joys, blessings, his death and his resurrection.

Can we leave behind the old life for the new life which must gain momentum? We were born into this matrix or illusion of what we believed to be everything and to right, when everything felt wrong. Some of us have unworldly minds and hearts and have discovered that we too have a soul that desires God, whom our society have censored completely and frustrated through mainstream media. We were born into this violent world with the un-restraining of our civilization in full swing (we were taught about human rights, the greatness of the human race, the progress of the human race, the splitting of the atom, the technocratic and industrial revolutions and yet given no answer to the moral failures of human society).

Our scientific worldview with its hyperbole and analysis, runs like a linear scope of probabilities and statistics for which a machine might operate within, but surely not a feeling, loving human being. This cold scientific worldview does not need man, but rather ideally a machine of bare proportions and functions, where the metaphysics of the universe are removed for a hopeless sense of fatalism. Man strangely gives a religious air of importance to the notion of luck and chance, to everything, with a fatalistic impulse poured into the measures of all actions seemingly as if behind everything man semi-consciously knew that it was sheer madness to conclude that all things were created from a non-entity when a non-entity could never create the intricate fabricate and language within creation. What is conscious came forth from a conscious decision to impart these faculties into the creation and the creatures called man.